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Archive for March, 2009

Who Am I?

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you’ve done.
Not because of what I’ve done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I’m calling,
Lord, you catch me when I’m falling,

And you’ve told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.

Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me

-Casting Crowns “Who Am I”

This song really does speak to me on such a personal level.
God has watched me make so many SO many mistakes in my life, yet he still smiles upon me and loves me regardless.

Its amazing to wrap my mind around it.
He is so great and yet he loves me. The smallest speck on this planet. That he had a plan for me before I was born. He knew me in my mothers womb.

Just seriously stop && think about it.

Everything we do. The crazy day to day drama. The major hardcore sins, everything we do God still loves us. His love is amazing.

Hearing this song over and over.
::sigh::

It’s a good wake up call.

Life isn’t about me.
It isn’t about what I want.

I can be strong thru this. I know I can. God has been answering my prayers && has helped me be strong.

Yes I miss my husband. Yes I have cried. But thru God’s grace I’ve been going on with my day to day life && not stopping.

He has kept me in his arms while I walk thruout my day and hasn’t let go.
I need to stay in that faith that He will take care of the 3 of us even though we are seperated.

I pray for my husband every night.

I do miss him. So very very much. Some moments it feels unbearable, but then I pray and God listens && comes to my rescue (honestly he never left)

I’m going to be ok.

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Hot Dogs for Dinner

Dinner tonight is gonna be easy peasy because I really didn’t feel like going all out for just Tobin && I to eat.
He hasn’t been eating a whole lot anyways. I think that means another growth spurt is coming…joy ^_^

So as the majority of you all know Today Douglas left.
I’m surprisngly doing a whole lot better then I thought I would.

I cried a little…not surprisng at all but hey just thought I’d throw that out there.

&&
I’ve been coping very well so far.
I think its gonna hit me tonight when I go to bed alone.
=/

But we did have a good time last night and the past weekend has been great family time along with seeing some friends.

Plus I got to take oodles of pictures of me && my hubby so that was a bonus.
Dinner is almost done so I’m gonna post some pics then be off on mymerry way.

I’ll update probably tomorrow…or someting

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Douglas && I on Friday

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Tobin && I on Sunday (its a bit blurry but I love it)

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Douglas took this picture of Tobin && I love it

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Douglas && I last night.

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Douglas took this picture this morning in the car before he left.
One of my faves even though I look like utter CRAP (yayy crying and popping a zit that morning mehhhh)

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Wii Would Like to Play

I love my husband.
Seriously. He acts like he dosn’t care. But by golly he does
^_^

We were talking about ways to keep me motivated to clean the house and not mope around all day and night while he’s gone at basic,
I have my buddies && I will  be visiting Jackson once in awhile (sooner then ya think since I need to get the brakes repalced && they are waranteed in Jackson)

So I jokingly  made the comment about getting a Wii.

I’ve wanted one since they came out

&&
We actually got one!!

So yayyyy me

The only rule is that I have to make sure the house is picked up and laundry is done (or working on being done) before I turn the machine on.

Oh and Tobin cmes first (but thats a duhhh)

^_^

So wii would like to play!!

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